The Safe Parent’s Guide to YouTube

The YouTube logo on a computer screen

YouTube is a treasure trove of video content for kids. Whether they’re watching Peppa Pig, learning magic tricks, or doing kid yoga, the video sharing site has something for every child, no matter their age.

However, like any online platform, YouTube also poses safety risks to your child. In this guide, we’ll explore some safety concerns kids may face on YouTube and offer tips for managing your child’s YouTube experience to ensure they stay safe and happy online.

YouTube Safety Risks for Kids

YouTube makes it easy for children to watch one clip after the next, increasing the chances that your child may accidentally stumble upon inappropriate videos, including violent or sexual content, profanity, or hate speech. 

The comment section on YouTube can also pose a danger to kids — it is often unmoderated and can be a breeding ground for cyberbullying and other harmful content. That’s why it’s crucial to monitor your child’s YouTube activity and teach them how to report and block users who engage in inappropriate behavior.

Unfortunately, harassment and cyberbullying are common on YouTube, and kids may become targets of online abuse. As a parent, it’s important to be aware of the signs of harassment and to teach your child how to recognize and report this behavior. You also want to monitor your child’s activity on the platform and to have open and honest conversations with them about online safety and responsible behavior.

Finally, letting your child post videos on YouTube also carries risks, including potentially exposing them to online predators. 

For more info, check out our article on How to Talk to Your Children About Sharing Personal Information Online.

Managing Your Kids’ YouTube Experience

The good news is, there are several ways to manage your child’s YouTube experience to make it a safe and enjoyable online space.. 

  1. Parental controls: The quickest and easiest way to keep your child safe is to make use of YouTube’s parental control features. The site’s “supervised experience” feature allows parents to curate their child’s experience. This mode allows parents to choose from three different content settings, depending on their child’s age and maturity level. Parents can also manage their child’s search and watch history and enable or disable their child’s ability to like, share, and comment on videos. The supervised experience feature is designed to help parents monitor their child’s activity on the platform and ensure they are only exposed to suitable content. 
  2. Kid-friendly app: YouTube Kids is a separate mobile app aimed at children under 13. The app is simple to use with age-appropriate videos, channels, and playlists. YouTube Kids also makes it easy for parents to monitor and control their child’s viewing experience, including limiting screen time, disabling search, and setting a timer to remind kids when to take a break.
  3. Viewing restrictions: YouTube Restricted Mode allows parents to filter out any mature content from their child’s feed. This mode uses community flagging, age restrictions, and other signals to identify and filter out potentially harmful content. Keep in mind, Restricted Mode may not catch all inappropriate content, so it’s important to still keep a close eye on what your child is viewing on YouTube. 
  4. Monitoring apps: Third-party monitoring apps like BrightCanary can help parents monitor their child’s activity on YouTube, flagging concerning content and alerting parents when their child has been exposed to anything harmful. Monitoring tools are a simple and effective way to keep your child safe online. 

The Bottom Line

YouTube can be a wonderful way for your child to explore their interests and learn new things. But as with any online space, the platform carries safety risks. Fortunately, with a bit of planning, you can keep your child safe while allowing them to take advantage of all the site has to offer. 

one tween girl and boy watching their smartphones with emoji icons near the phones

The day your child gets their first phone is almost as exciting as when they get their first car. It’s a big step toward their independence and a chance to show you they can be trusted. A phone is also a great way for you to ensure your kids are safe and to know where they are at all times.

However, getting your child a phone also carries risks, and you want to make sure you put rules and guidelines in place to help them navigate their new device. Let your child know that owning a phone is a privilege, and as long as they follow the rules, a phone can be a wonderful tool for connection. 

So what’s the best way to handle your child’s first phone? Here are five tips to get you started.

Choose the right device 

Choose a device that allows you some control, but that gives your child some leeway, too. For instance, phones that are made for children with restrictions already in place can be too limiting for both child and parent. Standard phones already have plenty of options for parental controls that give kids and parents some freedom.

It’s best to choose a device that links with what your family already uses. For example, if you use an iPhone, it makes sense for your child to use an iPhone as well. That way, you can use the same cloud, have access to Find my iPhone, use Family Sharing, and have more control over your child’s phone than if it were outside your network.

Having phones on different networks makes it more challenging to track, manage, and keep your child safe.

Activate built-in parental controls

Most phones have built-in parental controls, and it’s a good idea to use them. Activate features like screen time, “Ask to Buy,” restricted websites, and app limits. The more parental controls you put on the phone, the less you need to worry when your child uses their phone without you nearby. 

Other tips include setting passwords for in-app purchases and clicking “don’t allow” in the parental controls so kids can’t download, delete, or change apps and information on the phone without your permission. 

Another option is to use a child safety tool like BrightCanary, which monitors your child’s social media use and alerts you when your child is exposed to harmful content. 

Establish boundaries

You want your kids to have a sense of freedom as they grow up, while also making sure they aren’t being exposed to more than they can handle for their age and maturity level. From the start, establish rules and boundaries with the phone.

For instance, put a basket on your kitchen countertop and set a time that the phone must be in the basket at night. This ensures your child doesn’t take their phone to bed and scroll through their phone instead of sleeping.

Other boundaries include using a password that both parents know and that kids won’t change. You can also set rules, such as requiring that your child respond to your text or calls as soon as possible — or you will take the phone away. Put these rules in a digital device contract and have them sign it.

Tech check-ins

Let them know from the beginning that you’ll check in on their phone activity. Don’t have a set day and time that you do this, though. Instead, do random checks of your child’s phone. This will ensure you see the true phone activity, rather than the cleaned-up version you get when they know you’re going to check it. 

Make it clear that you’ll read text messages, check browsing history, and go through their apps. Reassure them this is all for their safety, not because you’re nosy or want to spy on them.

Choose apps together

Let your child know that you will choose apps together. This doesn’t mean your child can’t ask you for a new app, but you’ll review the app together and decide if it is age-appropriate. A good resource is Common Sense Media, but you can also read the app’s description and reviews and talk to other parents about which apps they think are safe for kids. 

It’s a good idea to go through any new app’s settings as soon as you download it to enable any parental controls. 

Final thoughts

Giving your child their first phone can be scary, but it’s a step toward independence and maturity. Plus, it gives you another way to keep tabs on your child in today’s complex world. Establishing rules from the start and following through on them is key.

Don’t let your child have free reign with the phone at first and then try to restrict them. Instead, set the rules from the start and even consider having them sign a phone contract so you are both on the same page. That way, you ensure your child uses the phone according to your guidelines and understands the consequences if they don’t.

father and daughter looking at phone together with social media icons to the right

You might struggle with the idea of being “one of those parents.” You don’t want to think of yourself as constantly helicoptering over your kids, getting involved in every little thing they do. But should you monitor social media accounts? You want to help your kids grow into confident, independent adults, and you worry that virtually hovering over their online activities is just as bad as doing so in the real world. 

You might also think of device monitoring as invading your child’s private spaces. Would you regularly go through desk drawers, closets, or backpacks without some reason to do so? If not, why should you monitor their online activities? Here’s why you want to keep a close eye on your child’s social media activity, and the best way to do it. 

Why it’s important to monitor social media accounts

For some of us, walking into a library as kids meant the beginning of a great story adventure. Online platforms are taking that place for our kids. Every family needs to decide for themselves when their child is ready to access online content, and for how much time every day or week. But once you decide to let them out on the internet, you need to help them learn how to navigate what’s out there.

If your child walks to school alone by themselves, they don’t simply leave the house the first morning and figure it out on their own. You probably walked with them several times to make sure they understood the route, offered caution around any big dangers (busy intersections with long stoplights), and all the things they might encounter on the way. You acted as “training wheels” for your child as they learned to do this independently.

Monitoring their internet use is similar. As your child takes their first steps as an internet user, you as a parent can and should come along.

How to monitor your child’s online activity

It can be daunting as a parent to figure out how best to monitor all of your child’s social media accounts. That’s where monitoring tools can help. 

Using a tool to monitor their activities on the biggest social media platforms like Instagram and TikTok is just like walking with them to school as they learn to be more independent. Monitoring tools like BrightCanary make it easy for you to have a single dashboard to keep track of your child’s online activity. These child safety apps also alert you when your child might have been exposed to any concerning content.

Some parental control apps slow down your child’s device and shorten battery life, so keep that in mind when choosing which monitoring tool to use.

When to start 

It’s best to start monitoring your child’s online activity early, when they’re just starting to get familiar with social media. 

If you’re the parent of a 15-year-old, it may be much more difficult for them to understand why you want to start monitoring them. With younger children, introducing these kinds of “training wheels” is a great way to show that you trust them but that you’re also there to help with anything they need. You’re teaching them that there’s nothing to be afraid of since their parents will be there for them as they grow up.

Still, it’s never too late to offer guidance, so don’t shy away because you think your child is too old for monitoring. This is an opportunity for you and your teen to have a conversation and arrive at an arrangement that works for both of you. 

Final thoughts

Monitoring your child’s activities on the biggest internet platforms is just like walking with them to school before letting them walk by themselves. Fortunately, monitoring tools make it easier to help you guide your child as they learn to navigate the online world. 

FAQs about monitoring your child’s online activity

Should you be monitoring your child’s online activities? 

Yes, parents should be keeping a close eye on their child’s social media activity to protect them from any harmful content and guide them on how to navigate the internet. 

What is the best way to monitor your child’s social media accounts? 

As a parent, it can be daunting figuring out the best way to monitor all of your child’s online activity. That’s why a monitoring tool is a good idea. Tools like BrightCanary allow you to track your child’s online activity using a single dashboard, and send you alerts when they may have been exposed to harmful content. 

child on yellow sofa using a slow internet device

You’re trying to be a good parent, and you want to stop your kid from using their phone at all hours of the day and night.  You want to limit how much time they spend on TikTok, and you definitely don’t want them to find their way onto “those” websites. So, you installed an app to have some control over their online experience — but now, their phone isn’t working the way it should. You might be wondering, “Why did my parental control app slow down my child’s phone and drain their battery?”

Traditional parental control apps like Circle, Bark, Qustodio, MMGuardian, and others seem appealing.  Because they don’t come from the operating system maker (Apple, Google, or Microsoft), they have to rely on different ways to make their monitoring technology work. They found an effective workaround: these products are all built around Virtual Private Network (VPN) technology.

What is a VPN?

VPN stands for “virtual private network.” A VPN redirects your online activity through a remote server run by a VPN host. 

Think of VPNs as a special “pipe” to the Internet from your phone or computer. Instead of sending your requests for netflix.com directly to your home internet provider, having a VPN forces all your connections to go through their software first. In the case of parental control apps installed on your child’s phone, they make all of your child’s browsing and app activity go through their software.  

You might have heard of VPNs as something your company uses to let you connect to their servers and software when you’re not in the office. More recently, you might be hearing about  them as a way to be secure when using the internet when traveling, or to get access to things like BBC videos, normally only available in the UK, when you’re home in the US.

How does a VPN work with parental control apps?

VPN-based apps can tally the access each time your child uses a specific app, such as Instagram. They can also stop your child from connecting to Instagram if they have exceeded the limit you set, or if it’s after bedtime.

Why would a VPN-based parental control app cause my child’s device to work less efficiently?

The problem is that the app is frequently in communication with your child’s device, and that uses up the device’s battery. VNPs require CPU power to keep track of activity, and it necessarily slows down the network because every request is evaluated to make sure it’s allowed. 

This means longer times to load a web page, start an app, message a friend — all of which just makes the device more frustrating.

Kids can get around VPN-based parental control apps

With iOS devices, it is very straightforward for a savvy kid to disable the VPN installed by the parental control app. If you read the parental reviews on the iOS App Store for these products, you will see many references to “it was easy for my kid to figure out how to disable this.” It’s not really the fault of the parental control software makers — there’s no other way to integrate their product with the operating system.

Apple, Google, and Microsoft all offer relatively robust parental control features for free with their operating systems: Apple Screen Time, Google Family Link, and Microsoft Family Safety. We recommend parents first try these if you need to set parental controls, like screen time limits and blocking access to certain apps.

BrightCanary is different than other parental monitoring apps because it doesn’t use a VPN. The app works entirely from your phone, so your child can’t delete it. You can use BrightCanary to monitor your child’s online activity and texts on Apple devices, and it will send you alerts when your child interacts with potentially concerning content. All you need to activate it is install it on your own phone and link their accounts. 

Final thoughts

Parental control apps are built on VPN technology, which can use up a device’s battery and make the internet run more slowly. Device manufacturers (Apple, Google, and Microsoft) all have parental control features built into their operating systems. For more visibility into what your child encounters online, BrightCanary fills in the gaps on Apple devices — and it doesn’t use a VPN, so it won’t slow down your child’s phone.

boy playing basketball alone on a court

The proliferation of social media means that kids are exposed to all kinds of new terms and pop culture references. Many are perfectly harmless, while others might be worthy of a conversation with your teen or preteen. One of the terms that has recently entered the online lexicon is “sigma male.” 

Like its cousins “alpha male” and “beta male,” which are rooted in the language of social dominance hierarchy, sigma male is increasingly being used to describe a certain type of male personality. 

Read on to learn more about what the term sigma male means and how to talk to your child about it. 

What is a sigma male?

A sigma male is an independent, strong-willed person who stands out from the crowd with a quiet but determined confidence. You may see the term paired with “sigma mindset,” which refers to a sense of self-sufficiency and rejection of social norms.

Also known as a lone wolf, people who identify as sigma males aim to chart their own paths and emphasize their own self-worth. They are often uninterested in traditional forms of success such as wealth, status, and fame. Instead, they look to live life on their own terms and strive toward personal fulfillment. They value freedom and independence, and may view rebellion against societal norms as a worthwhile endeavor.

Sigma male origins

“Sigma” is the name for the 18th letter of the Greek alphabet. The term follows the pattern of assigning Greek letters to characterize masculine hierarchy, including “alpha,” to denote an aggressive leader and “beta” for a submissive follower. 

In 2010, the conservative writer Theodore Robert Beale, known as “Vox Day,” first used the term on his blog. Subsequently, the term gained wider popularity in Internet discourse and in memes, including among bodybuilders and biohackers. The superhero action character John Wick, played by Keanu Reeves, is often described as an archetypical sigma male. 

Mark Manson also described a sigma male in his 2016 best-selling book, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck — a self-described “counterintuitive” guide that aims to reframe how to live a meaningful life. 

Sigma male vs. alpha male personality

People who align with the sigma male mindset often view themselves as non-conformists and possess an alpha-like attitude, without the desire or need for recognition or power over others. 

Key differences between alpha and sigma males include: 

  • Alpha males can be aggressive. Sigma males pursue their goals with quiet determination.
  • Alpha males are highly social. Sigma males prefer solitude.
  • Alpha males are dominant. Sigma males are more content to be in the background.

Why is it important to talk to your child about it?

Sigma male isn’t just slang. Along with other terms in the language of social dominance, like “alpha” and “beta,” the term “sigma male” can be reductive and overly simplistic. While many of the characteristics of the sigma male — such as independence, self-reliance, and confidence — are good, some experts believe that people who excessively identify with the term may also be masking feelings of insecurity.

Children need to understand that they are complex human beings with different, and often conflicting, personality traits. An over-reliance on any single term might hinder a person’s ability to fully understand or appreciate themselves. 

Conversations to have when your child learns about the sigma male

  • The term may signal to parents that they should check in on their child’s self-esteem. Sigma males project confidence in who they are. Sometimes they are truly confident, and other times, the appearance of confidence and rejection of social norms can be a front for insecurity. Social media algorithms may serve this type of content to children whose online behavior has signaled low self-esteem. 
  • If age-appropriate, it’s worth talking about equality and misogyny if your child mentions sigma males, because people and groups who misappropriate the term may segue into misogynistic concepts. 

The bottom line

A sigma male describes himself as a strong, independent person who doesn’t need to draw attention to himself or display dominance. They do not measure success by the generally accepted measures, like wealth, status, or fame. Instead, they pursue personal fulfillment.

It’s a good idea to check in regularly with your child about any confusing terms they may have encountered online. Regular conversations and monitoring their online activity can help you get ahead of new trends that may influence your child. By starting a dialogue with them, you build trust and encourage them to come to you to discuss difficult topics. 

boy with headphones on laptop with a thought bubble indicating he's sharing personal information online

As parents, it’s crucial we educate our children about the dangers of sharing personal information online. Kids are spending more and more time online, making it more important than ever to teach them about online safety and data privacy. In this article, we’ll discuss what counts as personal information, why it’s vital to keep that information private online, and what to do if your child accidentally shares personal data. We’ll also provide discussion starters for talking to your kids about the importance of online privacy.

What Counts as Personal Information Online?

“Personal information” can mean many different things, especially to your kids, who may have never before come across the topic. The list below is a summary of different types of personal information that your child should know is private and sensitive. Take the time to go through this list item by item to ensure your child understands each one well:

  • Full name
  • Street address
  • City and state of residence
  • Phone numbers
  • Email addresses
  • Birthdate
  • Birth month or year
  • School name
  • Images of themselves or their family
  • Usernames and passwords
  • GPS location information
  • Names of family members and friends
  • Health information

Keep in mind that personal information doesn’t only include text-based information. It can also include pictures or videos that reveal personal information, such as school uniforms, street signs, or house numbers. 

Even seemingly innocent information, like the name of your child’s school or their city of residence, can be used to piece together a picture of their life and whereabouts. Knowing how to protect personal information online can prevent identity theft and other data breaches. 

Why Do We Need to Keep Personal Information a Secret?

Children between the ages of 8 and 14 are still developing their understanding of the digital world and need to be made aware of the risks of sharing personal information online. Personal information, such as your name, address, phone number, or birthdate, can be used to steal your identity or commit fraud. Sharing this information on the internet can also make it easier for strangers to find and contact your child, which can put them at risk.

Additionally, posting certain information or pictures online can have long-term consequences. For instance, a future employer may search for your child online during the hiring process. If there are pictures on the internet of them at a raucous party, for example, it may jeopardize their job possibilities. By keeping personal information private, your child can protect themselves and their future.

What Happens If My Child Accidentally Shares Something They Shouldn’t Have?

If your child accidentally shares personal information online, it’s essential to address the situation quickly. Encourage your child to delete the post or message and to change any usernames and passwords they may have shared. 

Gently remind your child that it’s important to think before sharing anything. Additionally, remind your child that even if they delete a post, it doesn’t mean the information is gone forever. People can take screenshots or share the information. Make sure your child understands this point: Once something is posted online, it’s there forever.  

Tips for Protecting Personal Information

The good news is there are tangible steps your child can take to protect their personal information online. Here are some tips for parents to help their child practice online safety:  

  • Encourage your child to use privacy settings on social media and other online accounts. For example, if your child is on social media, make sure their Instagram account is private, so random strangers cannot see their posts. 
  • Remind your child never to share personal information in response to an unsolicited text message, direct message, or email. 
  • Teach your child to think before posting and to consider the long-term consequences of what they share. Limiting your child’s social media usage is wise until you are confident they fully understand the implications of their digital actions. 
  • Encourage your child to use strong, unique passwords for all their online accounts.
  • Regularly check your child’s social media and other online accounts to ensure they are behaving in a safe and responsible manner. A monitoring app like BrightCanary can help you keep tabs on their activity, directly from your phone.

It’s also a good idea to chat with your child about what they’re sharing online. Ask them to show you their social media accounts and explain what they’re posting and why. This can be a great opportunity to teach them about the importance of privacy and identify potential issues with their online behavior.

Talking Points and Discussion Starters

It isn’t always easy broaching topics of safety, both in the real world and online, with your child.  Here is a list of questions and discussion starters about how to behave online and the importance of not sharing sensitive information:

  • Why is it important to keep personal information private online?
  • Can you give an example of personal information that should not be shared online?
  • What are some ways to protect personal information online?
  • What should you do if you accidentally share personal information online?
  • Why is it important to think before you post something online?
  • How can you tell if someone online is trustworthy?
  • How can you tell if a message or email is legitimate or a scam?
  • What are some potential consequences of sharing personal information online?

The Bottom Line

By starting these conversations with your child, you can help them understand how to protect personal information online and equip them with the knowledge and skills they need to stay safe. Remember, the most crucial part of protecting personal information is knowing what is being shared, and with whom. With these tips and discussion starters, you can help your child navigate the digital world safely and responsibly.

Another day, another news article about Harry and Meghan, the British prince and his American actress wife who famously stepped back from their royal duties to start afresh in California. 

girl looking at phone with icons indicating she is consuming content about the British royal family

In their Netflix docu-series Harry & Meghan, the pair claim racist attacks by the British press are what drove them away from royal life. In a widely-televised interview with Oprah, Meghan alleged a senior royal made comments about her unborn child’s skin color. She said she had also asked for mental health support, and the royal establishment refused. 

If your children are on social media, there’s a good chance they’ve seen something about Harry and Meghan. Here are some topics that might come up, and how to approach them. 

Why Are Kids Talking About Harry and Meghan Now? 

The couple’s six-part docuseries, released in December, became the biggest documentary debut ever for Netflix. In January, Harry published Spare, his blockbuster memoir about growing up as a royal and the trajectory of his and Meghan’s relationship. 

Harry and Meghan’s revelations about her treatment by the press and the royal family raises a number of issues, including the challenges of being in such a high-profile relationship and the difficulties of confronting racism within a historical institution. It also touches on the need for better mental health awareness. 

🤝 Instantly understand what your kids are seeing on Google, YouTube, TikTok, and social media: Start your free week!

How to Talk about Harry and Meghan With Your Kids

Your child has likely heard talk about Harry and Meghan on social media, and they may have questions around issues such as mental health, racism, and media bias. Here are ways to broach these topics with your child.

Mental Health

  • This is a good time to remind your child that everyone struggles sometimes, and there’s no shame in asking for mental health support. Talk about how Meghan recognized that she was having a rough time, asked for help, and was denied treatment. So, her husband stepped in and took extreme measures to keep her healthy. 
  • Just like you’d get a cast for a broken bone, you might need treatment for mental health. 
  • Teach your child how to recognize the signs of depression and anxiety, and to talk to you if they experience symptoms. Let them know that there’s no worry that’s too small or too big — they are free to come to you with anything on their minds. 

Racism

  • Harry and Meghan’s story can encourage conversations around being mindful about the way you treat others and how to approach people who aren’t the same as you. 
  • You might use this opportunity to discuss overt racism, along with the concept of microaggressions which are sometimes harder to pick up on. 

Media and Bias

  • Harry and Meghan have openly discussed their own experiences and compared them to what the British media has reported. Those stories are not always the same.
  • Their experiences can be a jumping-off point for discussing not believing everything you see online, on TV, or in print, and you might explain that there are multiple sides to every story. 

Whether or not you are on “Team Harry and Meghan,” the couple’s struggles in the public eye are a great conversation starter about important topics affecting kids today.

child watching ipad with icons indicating that he is watching content about money, expensive cars, cigars, and jewelry

Andrew Tate, mostly known for his misogynistic social media presence, was recently arrested in Romania on allegations of human trafficking. It’s a disturbing story, and Tate’s message has a lot of parents worried. So why are so many young kids talking about him? And as parents, how do you talk to your kids about some of the objectionable things Tate is known for? 

Here’s what parents need to know about Andrew Tate.

Who Is Andrew Tate?

Andrew Tate is a former competitive kickboxer, entrepreneur, and social media influencer, who had 4.6 million Instagram followers before he was banned for violating the platform’s Terms of Service. He was also banned on several other platforms including Facebook and TikTok. His Twitter account was later restored when Elon Musk bought the platform. 

The self-described “King of Toxic Masculinity,” Tate developed a reputation for his misogyny. Here are a few examples:

  • On the “BFFs” podcast, Tate said that a man  should protect and provide for his female partner. He then compared a partner relationship to a parent-child relationship, saying “by extension, if I have responsibility over her, then I must have a degree of authority [over her].” 
  • In the same episode, Tate referred to women as property. He said, “If a woman is going out with a man, she belongs to that man, that’s his woman. So if she wants to do Only Fans [an adult subscription platform] she owes him some money because she’s his.” The host challenged Tate, asking him if the reverse was also true, if a man using his body to make money owed his female partner part of the profit. Tate replied, “I don’t know, because I think the women belong to the men.”
  • He has also said that if he cheated on a woman, he would not see it as “nearly anywhere near 1% as disgusting as female infidelity, because female infidelity involves emotion. You will not sleep with a man you don’t like. I can sleep with women I don’t like.”
  • He is quoted as saying women should “bear the responsibility” of being sexually assaulted.

Do you know what your child is watching online? Here’s how to see what they’re seeing so you can talk about it.


Why Was Andrew Tate Arrested?

Andrew Tate and his brother Tristan were arrested in Romania on December 29, 2022 for suspected human trafficking, sexual assault, and involvement in organized crime. Although no charges have been filed by the Romanian government, the Washington Post recently reported that Tate is being investigated on two counts of sexual assault. 

Why Do Young Kids Know About Andrew Tate?

Andrew Tate’s popularity surged when his videos started circulating around TikTok, a platform whose users typically skew younger. Tate’s platform seems to be resonating with tween and teen boys, who want to emulate his image as a self-made millionaire. 

Tate frequently posts outward signals of success, often posing with a cigar in front of one of his several luxury cars. Without evidence, Tate claimed that he was the world’s first trillionaire. His brand is largely built around an image of fast living, easy money, and pliable women. Tate has said that men who read books are dull-witted. 

Tate has displayed a talent for “shock marketing,” taking controversial and deeply offensive positions in order to generate a response. As a result, many of his performances have gone viral. In one of his online courses, Tate advises students to aim for 40% “haters” and controversy. 

He sells the idea that he can teach young men how to make money, attract girls, and break societal molds to achieve personal fulfillment. 

Parents, caregivers, and teachers say they are seeing harmful comments, discussions, and behavior patterns becoming more and more common among boys and young men. Educators in the UK have grown increasingly concerned that Tate’s noxious brand of masculinity has infiltrated the British school system

How to Talk to Your Child About Andrew Tate

It’s best to first ask your child what they know about Andrew Tate. That way, you can get a sense of what they’ve heard, what they already know, and where you can clear up any misinformation.

Your child’s age and maturity level will determine how deep you dive into the topic. Here are some ideas to start a conversation with them about Tate and what he represents. 

Human trafficking

Human trafficking is a tough topic to tackle with a young child. Here are some ways to frame it. 

  • Human traffickers force someone to work, and keep most or all of their money. 
  • Most of the time, the worker feels trapped, like they don’t have a choice. The trafficker may trick them into thinking a job will pay, when in fact it won’t.  
  • Sometimes the traffickers make promises and do not keep them, or they pretend they are in love with the other person to try to get them to do what they want. 
  • Human trafficking is against the law. If you work for money, you should keep the proceeds of your labor. You should never be forced to do jobs that you do not want to do.

Sexual assault

You can talk about sexual assault more candidly with older children, but when children are young, this is a tricky topic to discuss in an age-appropriate manner. For young children, you can discuss body autonomy, personal space, and consent. 

  • Andrew Tate was accused of sexual assault, which means touching another person’s body without their permission. 
  • Let your child know that they are never required to allow any hugs, kisses, or touches that you don’t want from another person — even if it hurts that person’s feelings when you say no. They’ll get over it! 
  • Ask your child, what would you say if [relative] wanted a hug but you didn’t want to hug? (This is a chance to role-play so that the child is comfortable saying no, even if the adult is repeatedly asking or being pushy.)
  • Let your child know that you can always offer a high-five, fist-bump or a wave instead of hugs or kisses. 
  • You can teach young children this boundary song.

Misogyny

Tate has a reputation for mistreating women, so this may be a good time to remind your child to treat everyone with respect. Here are some questions to get the conversation going. 

  • Do you know what respect is? 
  • How can we make sure we treat everyone the same, even if they’re different from us?
  • Healthy friendships and relationships are equal where both people give and take. Sometimes you get your way, sometimes the other person gets their way. 
  • In a partnership, no one is the boss or the authority, and if one person tries to control the other person, it’s a big sign that something is wrong. 

Coercive Power

Depending on the child’s age, talking about coercive power over another person can be tricky. Always take your child’s maturity level into consideration when discussing heavy topics. Here are some things you can say: 

  • When someone tries to control another person or have power over them, it usually comes from fear. Andrew Tate seems like he might be afraid of something. Maybe he doesn’t want to be embarrassed if a girl says no to him? Maybe he didn’t have a lot of money growing up and he’s afraid of feeling that shame again? We don’t know, but the need to control someone else usually comes from fear. 
  • Remember, bad feelings are part of life but they always pass. Sometimes a grown-up can help you feel better when bad feelings arise or when bad situations happen. 

The Bottom Line 

These aren’t easy topics to broach with your child, but it’s important to start the conversation with them. That way, if they see something confusing or disturbing online, now or in the future, they’ll feel comfortable coming to you to ask the hard questions.

child near blank signs looking at phone with like and love icons

Getting a young child their first phone is a big decision. And naturally, parents will have a lot of questions—is it too soon? Do they need it? Are they responsible enough? Is it safe at this age? What age should a child get a phone?

There are a lot of benefits to your child having a phone. They can reach you when they’re at a friend’s house, they can call you if practice ends early, and they can call grandma directly to tell her that mom still hasn’t figured out how to make her cinnamon rolls. 

Then on the other hand, you get so many warnings and dangers that you might think you’re harming your child if you give them a phone too soon. So, what’s the right age?

Average age for a child’s first cell phone

Are you hurting your child by giving them a phone early? The research is mixed. According to a study conducted by Stanford Medicine, there isn’t a correlation between when kids get their phones and their overall well-being. The study also found that the average age children get a phone is 11.6 years old, and the average age range is 10.7 to 12.5 years old.

But a recent global study found the opposite.

So while studies are still being conducted, your decision will depend on your child and your family’s beliefs.

Reasons a child might need a phone

You probably wonder why a young child would need a phone. It’s more common to hear about the negatives, so you might be surprised at how many scenarios there are when a phone makes sense:

  • They walk home from school or a friend’s house often, and you need to be able to track their whereabouts or for them to be able to contact you
  • Your child is in after-school or extracurricular activities, and you need to be able to contact them if you’re running late or someone else is picking them up
  • Your child is in charge of watching your other children, or they babysit and need a way to contact you quickly

Pros of giving a child a phone

Of course, giving a child a phone has pros and cons. First, let’s start with the good:

  • Safety. Having direct contact with your child no matter where he/she goes is important. In today’s world, you can’t be sure everyone and every place is safe, so giving your child a way to contact you in an emergency or you being able to track their whereabouts is important.
  • Teaches responsibility. Kids know that phones are expensive. Giving them a cell phone gives them something valuable to be responsible for, which can teach important lessons. Teaching your child to take care of the phone, not lose it, and use it responsibly can help him or her make mature decisions.
  • Parental connections. Most smartphones have a way to link the parent’s phone to the child’s. This helps you directly control what your child can and cannot do on the phone, and also helps you keep closer tabs on them via location tracking, etc. You can even set screen time limits or block specific apps and websites. 

Cons of giving a child a phone

Understanding the downsides of giving a child a phone is important too. They include:

  • Keeping up with the Joneses. If you get your child a phone because everyone else has one, you aren’t teaching them to make their own decisions and not worry about everyone else. And when their classmate gets the newest version that just hit stores, all of a sudden the one they have might not be good enough. 
  • They are expensive. Phones are costly, and if your child loses or breaks it, the cost is even higher. It’s a big responsibility to give children; if your child isn’t ready, it can be disastrous.
  • Access to unwanted content. If you aren’t careful, your child may access content you don’t want them to see. You must be regularly reviewing their phone use, using a child safety app, and limiting what they can access to keep them safe.
  • Marketing influx. The apps that kids like to be on tend to be marketing machines. When kids have a steady stream of ads and influencer content, they may start asking for trendy items that they wouldn’t normally be interested in.
  • People with ill intentions. Between scams, catfishing, and predatory interactions, having a phone can open up your children to unwanted attention. There are ways to safeguard your children, but having a phone does open them up to potential problems. 

How do you know your child is ready for a phone?

No two children are the same, but here are some signs your child is ready for a phone:

  • Your child is showing signs of maturity and independence 
  • You can trust your child to share the passwords with you and allow you to check the phone often
  • Your child obeys basic rules around the home, such as bedtime or turning the TV off after enough screen time
  • Your child can agree to your terms and conditions of owning a phone

Signs your child isn’t ready for a phone

If your child exhibits any of the following signs, they may not be ready:

  • Your child is impulsive and makes decisions that aren’t in their best interest
  • Your child constantly loses things and blames everyone else for it
  • Your child routinely defies basic household rules, and there’s frequent disagreement around behavior especially as it relates to safety
  • You worry about your child being too distracted by more screen time

Final thoughts

There’s no right or wrong age to get your child a phone. It depends on your child’s maturity level, ability to handle such an investment and your child’s activities that might warrant getting a phone much sooner than others. Don’t base your decision on what other families do, but on what you and your family value and need for peace of mind.

child with headphones looking at phone next to social media and internet icons

As a parent, it’s important to stay in tune with your child’s online world. Having access to their passwords allows you to monitor who they’re communicating with and what content they’re accessing on the internet. Knowing your kids’ passwords also protects them from inappropriate content. Here are some of the benefits of having your kids’ online passwords.

You can help kids secure their accounts

Choosing strong passwords

If you have your kids’ logins for social platforms and other online services, you can help them choose stronger passwords that are more likely to stay secure from hacking attempts since weak passwords are more prone to breaches. 

Two-factor authentication

You’ll also be able to make sure their online accounts have two-factor authentication (2FA) enabled as an additional layer of security, further reducing the risk of theft or hacking attempts by people who might want access to those accounts without permission. 

You can keep tabs on your kids’ online activity

Having your kids’ passwords allows you to monitor your child’s online activity and messages, either by accessing their devices directly or by using monitoring apps. 

Why monitor your kids’ online activity? There’s a lot of content out there that’s inappropriate for certain age groups, and it’s easy for kids to access questionable content — both accidentally and on purpose. If you’re monitoring your kids’ activity, you can help guide them when they run into a situation they weren’t ready for. 

Bullying is an issue across age groups, so if you’re keeping an eye on your kids’ online interactions, you can help your children through potential bullying situations as they arise, before they escalate. 

We recommend using an app so that you can keep a discreet eye and ear on what your kids are doing online, without asking them to hand over their phone or tablet. BrightCanary is a monitoring app that you open on your own phone to see what potentially concerning content your kids have viewed, or show you everything they’ve viewed — your choice. 

If you know what your kids are up to online, you can have better conversations about internet safety and digital citizenship. An open dialogue helps kids understand why we need rules, why some content is okay but not other content, and what information we share and keep private. 

Kids lock themselves out of their services 

Having your kids’ passwords can save you from going through lengthy password recovery processes. Video game platforms are especially clunky when it comes to password recovery — the steps and checks can seem endless. 

It’s good that platforms have security measures in place, but it’s super inconvenient when you lock yourself out of your own account. If you have your kids’ passwords, you’re ready.

💡 Download your free Password Keeper and have all of your logins conveniently in one place.

You can enable parental controls

If you have access to your kids’ passwords, you can enable parental controls — either through the devices themselves, or on an app’s built-in parental control settings. 

Sometimes kids get upset when you put restrictions on their devices, but they get used to it. Let them know that you will revisit their settings often and adjust them as they get older and develop their tech smarts. 

You can respond quickly if their passwords are compromised

If your child’s password is ever compromised, you will be able to quickly respond and change it before someone has a chance to do harm with it. 

In cases when devices or accounts are connected to a parent account, you will sometimes get alerts to your parent account when there’s unusual activity on your child’s device. It all depends on what behaviors trigger an alert, and what device and app settings are activated. 

The bottom line

Having your children’s passwords can provide you with an extra layer of security while they are exploring the digital world. Remember, as a parent, it is your responsibility to make sure that your kids are not exposed to any dangerous or inappropriate content online. Keeping their passwords secure will also help protect them from identity theft, phishing scams and other online fraud. This way you can ensure that your kids have safe and enjoyable digital experiences. 

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